Change...... necessary but not at all fun

So.......

Tony and I are officially done for the time being as of yesterday. We have not had a physical relationship in months, so we have basically been like roommates more than like bf/gf.

So far I hate this, but I know that time will ease the pain. He said that he knows I am headed towards marriage, and moving forward with my career, but he isn't ready for that. He said that he cannot be the bf I need him to be right now because he has a lot of matters (student loan debt, etc) he needs to get straightened out in his own life, and that it is not fair to me because he would not be thinking about me as much as he should be.

He said that he does still have feelings for me, but right now the best thing he can do is be my best friend. He said that he doesn't want me to leave his life because I am key to his survival. I am fine with that, since we haven't had much of a relationship recently anyway.

The living situation makes it really difficult for us. The rent for our 1 BR is almost $1200 a month and though I can afford it on my own, it will be very very tight. I need him to leave because otherwise it is going to be too hard for both of us to accept this for what it is and begin to heal.

Overall, I am doing as well as can be expected. I knew this was a possibility, but I really thought we would be able to work through this rough patch.

The old cliche phrase, "everything happens for a reason," is so over said but so true. : (